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May 11, 2006

all I know is.

All I know is that loving you is what I did with my life. And I'm terrified by what happened to us.

...But I'm just not interested in watching this second adolescence. I had my adolescence. I can't go through yours again. ...

And I'm not going to be getting any thinner or younger, my ass is gonna hit the ground, if it hasn't already--and I want to be with somebody who can still see me in here. I'm still in here. And I don't want to be resented or despised for changing ... I'd rather be alone. I don't want someone to have contempt for who I've become.

I feel like I've done my best to honour the past, and what you were and what you are now--but you want something more than that, something new. I can't be new.

_{Zadie Smith, from On Beauty}

Posted by JudyLa at 06:00 AM | Comments (0)